


Jem Jammer's Day Off

by WithLovingRegards



Category: Jem Jammer
Genre: Crooked Russian Cam, Jem Jammer Podcast, Multi
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-10-31
Updated: 2019-10-31
Packaged: 2021-01-15 03:29:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,717
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/21246752
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/WithLovingRegards/pseuds/WithLovingRegards





	Jem Jammer's Day Off

There were a lot of times in her life when Jylliana couldn’t put her mind or body to rest, forced to spend nights either restlessly tossing and turning in her bed or working diligently on a current project. Most of the time, it had been stress related, or even her body so racked with worry there wasn’t even a slim chance of her getting a single wink of rest. It’s something the woman had gotten used to.

But now the norm had changed. She’d had a good nights rest, and would have continued to do so if she hadn’t felt something moving in gentle circles across her back, soothing her but also causing her a moment of confusion. Blinking awake, it took less than a second to realize what was going on, and a second more for her face to go dark with a blush.

Lachlan, beautiful, shirtless Lachlan, looking at her so tenderly as she slept, unable to stop touching Jyll now that he had her so close. Her skin had become familiar under his touch, his fingers knew where every bump and scar lay, and loved them all the same. When he noticed the woman wake, he gave her a bashful smile, his skin also darkening.

“Good morning. I didn’t mean to wake you.”

They’d shared a bed for some time now, sleeping wrapped around one another, but still, they both found it a little awkward. Not because they didn’t enjoy it, or because they had doubts, they were just so wholly unprepared to actually have everything they’d ever wanted. They both thought themselves too lucky to be with the other, and they couldn’t help but act like 12 year old, love-struck idiots.

“I, um, I’m not complaining. That feels really good. I should really be enjoying it more. We only have so much vacation time.”

“Not sure I’ll be able to leave this room every morning once it’s over. This has been heaven, and we’re not even at the best part yet.”

This was too much; he was too much. Pushing away the restraint, Jylliana pushed herself up to kiss Lachlan, secretly enjoying the surprised sound that left his mouth, but enjoying the way he kissed her back even more. As he held her tighter, pulling her even closer to his naked chest, the woman dared to dart her tongue into his mouth, deepening their kiss and connecting them further. His small tusks pressed against her lips, and the sensation, so new but also so familiar, was enough to make Jyll melt even farther into him

Apparently, since it was so early in the morning, their inhibitions hadn’t quite caught up to them yet as Lachlan took this opportunity to roll on top of Jyll, pinning her with his hips and caging her with his arms on either side of her. It broke their kiss, sadly, but it gave Jylliana time to look at him, to drink in this image she never thought she would get to see.

“You’re so beautiful.”

She hadn’t meant to say that out loud. It was usually a mantra that she sang in her head, but again, it was too early to hold anything back, it seemed. The half-orc blushed almost as deep as she’d ever seen him, only surpassed by one instance, and he ended up lying his entire weight onto Jyll’s body, hiding his face into the crook of her neck.

“Isn’t that supposed to be my line?”

His mumbled words into her skin tickled, making the woman chuckle, and she started to run her fingers through his hair.

“Sorry, I just call it how I see it.”

“That’s not how it usually works in those novels you read.”

Jyll’s cheeks burned in embarrassment, and had she not had a whole man laying on top of her, she would have covered her face.

“Why do you have to bring that up so often?!”

Lachlan laughed as he started to push himself back up again, looking into Jyll’s eyes now, filled with joy and a hint of awkwardness, but what was new?

“Because Cacophony still asks me the average size of-”

“Okay, okay, I get it. And as much as I’d like to stay in here with you, we’ve got a big day coming up. And the longer we stay holed up in this room, the more everyone will continue to make fun of us.”

“We could just stay in here until the ship hits port,” the half-orc suggested, nibbling at Jyll’s neck. The woman sucked in a breath, the rebellious part of her brain immediately agreeing to that plan, but was able to gather back her willpower. No matter how hard it had been.

“It’s a good idea. Until we’re stuck on the ship doing chores as punishment and we miss out.”

“You’re right, you’re right. But I don’t have to be happy about it.”

It took them a little bit to emerge from their room, having to remind themselves that, yes, they did need to show their faces, and no, they didn’t have time for- Well, either way, once they did make it out, they were greeted by looks from every crew member aboard. The only thing keeping them from bolting back inside was their intertwined hands.

“You guys must have had a very long night last night, since you’re gracing the world at such a late hour,” Cacophony purred, cocking a brow at them.

“We are currently on vacation, we can sleep in if we feel like it.” Except the blush, which she knew was sneaking to her cheeks, was under-miming her statement, even though they really had just been sleeping.

“Having a lively libido is extremely normal for new couples, and probably far more demanding in a… what did you call it?”

“Throuple.”

“Yes, that,” Aelfgifu said, her tone matter of fact.

“Please, Goddess, stop this madness and swallow me whole.”

Lachlan, blushing just as deep as she was, squeezed Jylliana’s hand comfortingly. When she looked to him, he gave her a pained, but encouraging smile.

“It’s just everything we’ve always dreamed of,” the dramatic Eladrin sighed, the back of her hand resting against her forehead, “We go from our very own book club of reading half-orc on innocent women action, to having _real _half-orc on not-so-longer-innocent woman action. The novel came to life!”

“First of all, we were never supposed to talk about those books outside of the club, and secondly, butt out of my personal life and go work on your own!”

Before there could be any more arguing or teasing, Captain Bondar called down to the group of loiterers from the helm.

“If the lot of you don’t shut up, I’m going to turn this ship around! Which would be a shame, because we’re here!”

In a blink of an eye, everyone was towards the bow of the ship, eyes wide in wonder as they looked at the planet coming closer and closer into view. Praia, the vacation destination capital this side of wild space, lay before them. Only about 40% of the entire planet had been colonized, but that amount of land was a conglomerate of different places to be and things to do to entice visitors.

“Before you all jump overboard and run off into the sunset, there’s rules we need to go over!” Bondar shouted, forcing everyone to peel themselves away from their daydreams.

“What kind of vacation has rules?”

“It’s like we’re on a field trip,” Lachlan whispered, snickering a bit at the thought, “Especially since almost everyone on this ship acts like a child.”

“I can’t wait to get rid of all of you,” Alanna sighed, pinching the bridge of her nose, “We are only here for the weekend! Two days, two nights. I don’t care what you do, how much money you spend, or how drunk you get. But you bet your ass you’re going to be back on this ship early the final morning, ready to start our next job! You are not allowed to bring strangers onto the ship for any reason, and please keep the souvenirs to a minimum. Do I make myself clear?”

“Yes, Captain!”

“Then get the hell off of my ship.”

None of the crew members has to be told twice. It was a mad dash to see who could get off the boat first, with some pushing and shoving thrown into the mix. At one point, Jyll thought she was going to lose Lachlan in the stampede, but he gave her a warm smile, used his build to stop himself from being swept away, and used his incredibly buff arms to lift her up and carry her the rest of the way down the ramp.

“No, no, no. This isn’t fair! You can’t carry me. Put me down!”

The half-orc ignored her, her beet red face, as well as her continued pleas, which only grew more and more quiet the closer they got to main land. However, as soon as they made contact with the docks and he was able to get out of the direct line of traffic, he put the cleric gently back on the ground. Jylliana huffed, glaring up at her handsome, stupid boyfriend.

“I hate you.”

“No, you don’t.”

“You’re right. But I’m still mad.”

Lachlan grabbed onto her hand again, his grip warmly inviting, and started to tug her along.

“You won’t be mad by the time we make it to the Whispering Wind Bar.”

Unfortunately, he was right about that. The thought of finally, after such a long time apart, meeting up with their boy, squashed her mild annoyance, replacing it with excitement and nervousness.

“Oh, definitely. Come on then, let’s go see how much trouble we’re getting ourselves into.”

Thankfully, the Whispering Wind Bar wasn’t too far away from the docks, since it was one of the many bars to be nestled into the main port’s square. It took them little time to locate or reach the building in question, since they were a few notches away from practically running towards it. Looking at the wooden building, they couldn’t say it was something to write home about, or even recommend to visit.

“Wow, what a nice date spot,” Jyll grumbled sarcastically, already able to hear the commotion the patrons were making on the inside.

“He’s a pirate, what do ou expect? Let’s grab him, and we can go to somewhere less… this.”

Nodding with a sigh, Jylliana opened the door, in an instant bombarded by the noise of rowdy, drunk vacation goers. The couple grimaced, already tired of the atmosphere, but it all soon faded into the background when they entered. Not because it got any quieter, because that was not a peace they would be gifted, but because of the sight that stood only a couple meters away from them.

Max stood out like a star in the lonely night sky, bright and inviting all that looked at him. At the moment, he was the center of a sizable group of men and women, his laugh loud and somehow seductive, sending a shiver down Lachlan and Jyll’s spines.

It was hard for Jyll to keep her mouth from opening and closing like a gasping fish, because the way he was dressed was leaving her breathless. While he still gave off the strong aura of “pirate”, he was the bare bones of his profession at the moment.

He wore a brown leather vest, it’s worn straps and buckles hanging loose by his sides. But Max, that damn wolf man, wasn’t wearing a shirt underneath that vest, instead, showing off every inch of skin. Which, you know, neither of them was going to complain about, but just looking at him was enough to get their blood pumping. The humid heat of the planet had put a light sheen of sweat on his skin, highlighting the edges of his skin and muscles, all the way to his low riding pants, revealing the hard cut ‘v’ of his hips-

“Oh my god,” Lachlan sputtered, looking away as he started to choke on nothing, breathing shallowly.

Jylliana clapped the man’s back, even though she was having just as difficult time as he was. When she was sure that her half-orc boyfriend wasn’t going to choke to death, she looked back over to her other boyfriend. Or at least where he had been. Except he was now only a couple feet away from her.

“Goddess Max! You scared me!”

He sent her an apologetic smile then turned to look at his other lover.

“You okay there?”

“No thanks to you,” Lachlan grumbled and stood straight, with a flush showing his discomfort. That’s when Max smiled, more gently than he had any right to at the moment.

“That’s good.”

Then he pulled the man in for a kiss, threading his thick fingers through Lachlan’s dark hair, pulling him closer and deeper into the welcoming kiss. Lachlan made a surprised noise, but in mere instinct held onto Max’s hips as an anchor as he enjoyed a kiss from his boyfriend.

When Max pulled away, leaving one more parting peck on his lips, his usual cocky smile returned, and a blonde eyebrow raised.

“It’s so nice to see you again, my love.”

“I, uh, um, you… huh.”

Max winked at the man before turning to Jyll.

“I didin’t forget about you.”

Even though the woman was prepared for it, there wasn’t enough warning in the world for one of Max’s kisses. His lips were smooth against her own, with a spark igniting between them. He caught her bottom lip lightly between his teeth, nipping at her and earning himself a gasp in return. Though, before Jylliana could respond to the invitation and make herself look a fool in front of the whole bar, Max pulled away, caressing her cheek once as he moved back.

“I’m so glad to see you both. I’ve missed you.”

“Yeah, uh, you gotta give us a second. Or a minute.”

Max laughed, but did as they asked, watching with amusement as they took a breath and regained their rational thoughts back, though his look soon turned quizzical as he gave them the up an down. When he knew the two could comprehend words again, he let them know what he was thinking.

“Why are you guys still wearing your armor and normal clothes?”

“We are not going to be naked in this bar, Max!”

“That’s not what I meant Jyll,” Max said with a roll of his eyes, “I mean you guys are on the hottest vacation spot around and you’re in armor.”

“I know you’re not trying to get me to take off my armor, because that’s not happening. What happens if we get attacked, what am I supposed to do then? Just ask them to politely ‘not do that’?”

Max moved his hand to cup the back of the cleric’s head, coming close enough to almost kiss her again, only instead he looked deeply into her eyes, expression deadly serious.

“Jylliana, I would never in my life intentionally put either of you in harm’s way. You two are one of the most important things in the world to me. If anything were to happen, I would protect you. So, please trust me on this?”

-

“I can’t believe you convinced me to wear this.”

“It was either that, or something almost worse than being naked.”

“I still don’t know how that’s possible,” Lachlan complained from the neighboring dressing room, a curious snapping of elastic coming from his side.

“Will the both of you stop being babies and come out of there already? The more time you spend behind those curtains, the less time we have for a romantic evening.”

Huffing indignantly, Jyll pulled her curtain open, trying her hardest not to show how embarrassed she was in such revealing “clothing”. She was sure she was failing horribly.

Max had picked out the outfit, a long, delicately patterned sarong skirt, which would have been fine, if there hadn’t been two slits cut up all the way to her hips, showing almost too much skin with every move she made. A large, dark blue piece of fabric wrapped around her top, forming and ‘x’ over her chest and exposing her belly.

A few seconds after her reveal, Lachlan stepped out, and Jyll could almost feel the heat of his blush coming off of him in waves. The woman had to cover her face, because she was definitely enjoying the sight before her, but couldn’t let Max know that this had been a good idea.

Lachlan might as well have been shirtless with how much skin his crop top covered. It was sleeveless with the arm hole so big there was little more than an inch of fabric to keep in in the category of “shirt”. And the decorative knots and ties that had been crafted started just below his pecs, dangling not too far away from his belly button.

The most drool worthy part of the outfit, however, were the pants that had been picked out. A very tight fit that started a little higher up than Max’s own pants, but they were so restricting on the half-orc’s muscular thighs that they looked like they had been painted on. Which did great things for his ass, not to mention the bulge in-

“I don’t think I can let you two go out in this,” Max said suddenly, getting up from his seated position to stalk over to them, “As soon as you set foot outside, the whole planet is going to fall in love with you and steal you from me.”

He grabbed the pair and brought them closer to him, his arms wrapped around both of their waists, and his hands started to softly wander.

“I think we’ll have to be confined to a private room your whole stay. I’ll help you take these outfits off there myself.”

“Max, stop teasing us!”

“I’m being completely serious. Even if I let you guys go out, how am I supposed to stop staring at Lachlan’s ass?”

“That I agree on,” Jyllian let slip, just like she had this morning.

“I’m leaving,” Lachlan announced, pulling out from their intimate embrace and stomping out the door.

Max’s guffaw was loud, sensual, and not to mention contagious. Jyll joined in, chuckling at her other boyfriend’s expense, even though she was secretly glad it wasn’t her turn to be made fun of. When Max had wiped the tears from his eyes, he held out his hand to his girlfriend, which she took happily.

“We should probably catch him before he gets too far. I’m serious, someone might try to steal him away.”

“We can’t let that happen.”

Walking out of the store hand in hand, they saw that their third hadn’t made it very far, only a few store fronts away. He knew that sometimes to get out of mortifying situations, especially when Max was involved, before he lost all thought for the day and became an blushing zombie. As Jyll and Max passed by, he grabbed onto Max’s other free hand, and the trio made their way slowly to the planet’s most popular area: The beach.

-

  


Praia had too much going on, is what the throuple had learned. Max had known about some of the services and activities that it had to offer, but after viewing the packed beach for a single second, he knew that this was the galaxy’s biggest tourist trap. Either way, they had all loved it.

Dozens of stalls called out to them, promising them wares that they wouldn’t find on any other habitable planet. Most of the time, it was junk that they could easily identify, but one stall that had caught Lachlan’s eye had been one filled with shells, beads, and gems, which one could create jewelry with. He’d told the others to look at something else for a bit, seeming a bit nervous, but determined.

When the man had joined back up with them, he’d handed Max and Jyll simple bracelets made of a smooth twine which held different colored beads.

“The beads and sea glass matched your eyes perfectly, so I couldn’t pass them up.”

Staggered by the thoughtfulness, they dragged him back to the same booth so they could almost make him a matching bracelet. Deep down, they all really were love sick losers.

They’d picked up a couple of specialty drinks and snacks here and there, finding joy in just walking through the wet sand as the waves tickled their bare feet, telling stories about what they each had been up to while they’d been separated. It was honestly just so rewarding to be able to hear their voices, so relaxed without a care in the world.

Max had been excited to find they had this strange touch tank of the sea life from the planet. They’d been assured that none of the animals would hurt them, but they had all been very unfamiliar to Jyll, and she stayed as far away from them as possible. Just to be safe. Except she hadn’t thought that Max would end up being the danger to her. As soon as she hadn’t been paying attention to him, instead focused on a weird black blob Lachlan had been playing with, Max had splashed her with the icy water from the tank.

He occasionally continued to rub his shoulder from where Jyll had punched him in retribution.

As the day started to close, with the sun starting its decent into the horizon, Jylliana pulled the boys back towards the beach where other people had started to gather. She gave them a beaming a smile.

“Let’s watch the sunset together to end the perfect day.”

Just seeing their girlfriend so happy and content hit both the men in the heart, with Lachlan sending her a returning smile while it was finally Max’s turn to blush. Deciding not to tease the wolf boy like the adult she was, Jyll instead grabbed both the boy’s hands, pulling them towards a good spot.

Lachlan threw himself onto the ground, his legs stretched out and using his arms to lean back, a lazy sigh leaving his lips. Jyll sat closely next to him, trying not too hard to think as she laid her head on his shoulder. Jyll could feel his smile as he pressed a kiss to the top of her head.

“Well, if we’re going to get comfortable,” Max announced before quickly lying on the ground, not caring about the sand sticking to his entire body. Once he wiggled around to get comfortable enough, he placed his head on Lachlan’s thigh and gave him a toothy grin.

“That tasty thigh of yours is pretty damn cozy. I’m so lucky to have a beefcake like you in my life.”

“I will push you into the ocean. You’re right there.”

In response, the blonde quickly wrapped his arms around the half-orc’s thigh, giving him a defiant wink and a quick peck to the covered leg in question 

“I-I’m going to let that go because the sun is about to set.”

“Sure big boy, sure.”

They all did end up behaving as the sun said its final goodbyes to the planet for the day. A beautiful menagerie of colors started to blend together in the sky. The blues had long faded to be replaced by lazy yellows and bright oranges, soon giving way to gentle pinks that faded into deep reds. And when the purples made their appearance, ushering in the darker tones that made way for the night sky, the three of them couldn’t help but be enamored. They all spent most of their lives in space, but looking at it in a different way with people that mattered to you, that was a completely different, breath taking experience.

“I can’t believe the day went by so quick. I don’t think we even explored the entirety of this beach in all the hours we walked around.”

“Well, thank god we still have tomorrow.”

“Before you old geezers call it a night,” Max started suddenly, grabbing their attention as he sat up, “I want to show you something before we head back. It’s just not on the main path.”

Jyll and Lachlan looked at one another, a little reluctant at first, but decided that they would indulge the man. He grinned and helped them both up from the warm sand.

The duo immediately regretted their decision when Max lead them straight into the tropical forest, pushing past the brush and snapping the twigs that lay under foot.

“When you said off the main path, I didn’t think that meant into the heart of the god damn jungle!”

“Sacrifices have to be made sometime Jylliana.”

“I hope that sacrifice isn’t literally us.”

“I would make a joke, but I know you two would just turn around. I promise, it’ll be worth fighting the branches.”

After a couple minutes of zig-zagging around fallen trees, stumps, weirdly glowing mushrooms, and other nonsense that they couldn’t see in the growing dark, Max made a noise of success, turning excitedly to his partners.

“Ready?”

“Goddess, yes. My feet hurt.”

“I still think we might get murdered out here.”

Ignoring their complaints, Max moved the thick branches to the side, motioning for them to go through. They did as he asked, mostly because they could see some light coming out of the other side. Ducking, the two made it through, and almost immediately stopped in their tracks.

“I spotted it up in the sky as I was landing on planet. It was hard to figure out, but it seemed worth it. Do you guys like it?”

“It’s beautiful Max.”

The place in question was a small clearing, though there were lots of trees and bushes still growing around. Those glowing mushrooms seemed to find a haven here, growing on almost every rock and piece of bark in this small area, their lights different tones of blue, purple, and whites. In the off center part of the clearing was a small pond, though the water seemed deep enough to reach their hips. The trickling sound of water revealed that this seemed to be the end of a spring that started god knows where.

Jyll walked closer to the water, mesmerized by how clear it was, watching as the ripples disturbed the glass like surface, distorting the light that the mushrooms were casting onto it. It was almost bright enough for her to see her entire reflection.

Lachlan had made his way a little further, to the gentle noise of waves. Where the mushrooms started to be less frequent, Lachlan could see that there was a small section of sand to make a beach, with the waves crashing against the shore slowly. It was a little funny, because the expanse of the sand wasn’t very large, maybe big enough to hold the three of them lying down.

“I thought myself the luckiest guy in the world to find this place. It’s nice to have bars and shops around, but sometimes we forget just how beautiful nature is. I was so happy to share this with you guys. And thought that maybe we could just stay here and enjoy each others company?”

“Away from other tourists and prying eyes? Absolutely.”

Coming together again, the three found the most comfortable spot in the clearing. And even though they had plenty of space, they decided that it would be best to used Lachlan as a pillow again. This time, he smiled at the joke and pulled them in once they had all laid down, letting them lay their heads on his chest and tried to control his wildly beating heart.

“You can even see the stars from here,” Jyll whispered, pointing upward towards the faint, but twinkling stars above them.

So they stayed like that for a long time, wrapped up in each others embrace, talking quietly as to not break the peace. But the gesture said anything more than words ever could, and they lived in the moment as long as they could, because they wouldn’t be able to stay here forever. Instead, they would keep the memory of the perfect day in their minds, even when they were apart.


End file.
